Saltine's Book of Parables Give-Away Thread! (entry deadline March 18th)


Howdy folks! Now that the release process is complete, now that I have books in the US, UK, and EU I wanted to create an event for it here on lines because I’m on here every day and this book is somewhat intwined with lines (@dan_derks wrote the foreward and introduced me to the author!).

So this thread is that–and the event is that I’m giving away one copy to someone in the replies based on some criteria…
Should I say “I’ll know it* when I see it**?”
*the book’s new owner and home

Full disclosure, I’ve posted a few pics of this book before in the print, zines and publications thread, but it wasn’t out in the US at that time, so this “event” marks what I consider it’s completed release.

So before you throw your hat in, you’ll probably want to know a little bit about the book (smart.)…

Saltine’s Book of Parables is a collaboration between myself and Cody Sullivan. Cody is an amazing performer, and sometimes performs as Saltine. I’ll include a picture here:

Cody had written a handful of parables in Saltine’s voice, and we both thought it would be a great idea to make these into a book. Something about them reminded me of the dirty cartoons that seemed to be everywhere when I was a kid. Inside gum wrappers, in magazines. Does anyone else vaguely remember these? Anyway, because I was reminded of those, I wanted to give a nod to that illustration style.

I’ll show you a few images from inside the book now (It’s a salty book):

*I like this image because it shows the King Cole Bar in New York : )

Most of the illustrations were done using a brush pen, either pentel brand or kuretake brand. They’re both great. I’d say the pentel is my go-to though.

There are also 10 color panels. I’ll show a few here:

So now that you’ve seen what the book is about, here’s how to enter to win a copy:

  1. You must be living in the US (this is a US giveaway)
  2. Just respond with a photo of your favorite cracker or cookie NEXT to your favorite graphic novel, comic, or book.
  3. The winner will be selected by me in like, a week. I’ll edit this first post to say who won :slight_smile:

this book looks amazing! (i sort of remember those comics on gum wrappers… just the ‘Bazooka Joe’ one, but i don’t think i understood how dirty they were back then… now when i look up Bazooka Joe, i see an example of exactly what you’re talking about on the wikipedia page: Bazooka Joe - Wikipedia
(very male-centric/chauvinistic humor, too… i feel like apologizing for having consumed Bazooka Joe bubble gum… it was everywhere for free every Halloween, though :man_shrugging: :sob:)

so i apologize but i only have a stash of rare comics i keep in storage(i’ve not pulled them out in over a decade… there’s only maybe 40 comics in total, but they’re rare), and also i’ve developed gluten-intolerance so i have since not really found any crackers and cookies i like(rarely buy treats these days :crying_cat_face: )… so i know it can’t really count(if i had these in front of me, i’d take a pic of them for you but i probably won’t visit storage for them anytime soon), so instead, just to share what i wish i could’ve shared in a virtual submission just to show my support:

Wabbit Wampage, i think, started out as a board game, i bought the comic because the cover looked hilarious and thought the story would be amazing: it didn’t disappoint, basically a very violent story about the rabbits on a farm who had had enough of the farmer pushing them around and making them relocate their homes constantly every season he had to shift crops or something like that… a full on war ensued with dynamite, machine guns, and lots and lots of cussing… i was in heaven reading this when i was a kid(it’s a bit like those movies, Watership Down, or Secret of Nymh, but less tasteful, more violent, and with adult humor(never goes sexual, though, just violent, really really violent)).

Congratulations on the completed release! It looks so quality and impressive(must be an amazing feeling to complete this). Truly exciting and beautiful!


Hard to pick a favorite! The snack is a “Crispi Roll”. It’s a 12 grain crunchy shell with an almost creamy Taro center. The seaweed ones are good too.


It counts!
I just watched a Cartoonish Kayfabe on the effect the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles had on comics. I guessed (correctly) that this title would have come out around that time (So the turtles came out in '84, and these wabbit’s in '85). It seems like these combat animal comics are a genre of their own!

**I have to say…
I came up with the entry criteria on the fly as I was typing out the post, but I’m actually going to get a lot out of these recommendations!!! (I wasn’t even thinking “recommendations”…as funny as that sounds. I was just thinking deconstruction of “Saltine” and “book”)

And thanks for the kind words. It DOES feel awesome to get it out into the world. Making things is the best : )


Hopefully I’m not actually in the running, but it’d be nice to jump in on the spirit of book and cracker sharing.

The book, sadly out of print (particularly in this original “large” format) was super transformative for me. I just randomly saw it in a book store in the late 90s and thought that it looked interesting. It opened me up to circuit bending, EMI/Hopkin, and general DIY-ery that is still with me today. I still remember popping the CD in in my friends car on the way home from rehearsal and being blowing away by the sounds I was hearing. Literally mind blowing!

Sadly we don’t have much in terms of interesting crackers around the house, just the last few biscuits left in these digestives. To be fair, they are actually quite delicious and flavorful which betrays their humble(/shitty) packaging.


We don’t have good cookies in the house because we’ve eaten them all lol

We have a great little bakery we nip into to pick up our cookie and bread from every time we go to the post office (mail does not come directly to our house).


going to go with recent-ish favorites since absolutes are so hard for me

some fake-healthy cheezits (fake healthy is so on brand lol) and a pretty old adrian tomine (who i ignored for ages despite my ex being super into him).

I liked Summer Blonde a lot but I was really won-over when it called me tf out with this panel about being at a high school party and talking about japanese noise music and robotripping all-in-one

edit: while talking about fav graphic novels though, I’d be remiss to not mention julia wertz, alison bechdel, and junji ito, they all speak to me, deeply, and consistently, at my core.

edit 2: also congrats so much on getting the book out! that’s amazing. I plan on copping either way :slightly_smiling_face:


Man, I love cheezits! I wonder if I can get them here? There are American or British sections in stores sometimes…

I hear you about Tomine. I have his book, Killing and Dying. The stories didn’t do it for me, but I got the sense that it was just that one book that I didn’t respond to. I put him in the same category as Clowes (who I >LOVE<) and Chris Ware.
I haven’t come across the names Julia Wertz OR Alison Bechdel! Looking forward to seeing what’s up. Dykes to Watch Out For already seems awesome lol Great name!!


I think I’ve decided that I’m going to put everyone’s names in a hat and pull one out. I think that’s probably the best way to do it.


(oh wow: i never heard of a “pyrophone” but seeing that book makes me really want to make one DIY :telephone_receiver: :fire: i imagine it’s a thing used to call for fire… uh… to be clear: not call in the case of a fire that already exists, but in case you WANT fire :crazy_face: )

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Surprisingly it wasn’t one of the things that interested me the most, but it was still cool to find out about. That kind of thing falls into the “Tesla Coil” category for me, where it’s more science-tainment that musical instrument, but perhaps I haven’t heard anything cool done with one.

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Giving this a bump as we’re three days out. Give up your crackers and books folks

Also: FYI today is @Rodrigo ‘s birthday :cake:


@rbxbx CONGRATS! You get a Saltine’s Book of Parables! If you could message me with your address I’ll send one out immediately : )
Thanks to those who participated, and to those that didn’t participate but had a look at the link to see what the book was anyway.

@Rodrigo helped with the drawing and this is how we did it…
(We discussed video-ing it, for fanfare, but then went ahead with it):
I wrote everyone’s name on a little piece of paper, folded them up tightly so they all looked roughly the same.
Then I walked over to the other room and put them on the table in front of Rod to pick one.
He picked them all up shook them in his hands and he let one drop.

Again, thanks for taking part!


Yayyyyy. Super excited to read and absorb some of Saltine’s wisdom. Thank you for doing this :slight_smile:


Thanks for taking part. And I was super psyched to have some comics conversation too : )